OH DEAR LORD THAT'S MOIST

sailorbryant:

a-fragile-sort-of-anarchy:

Bad News: Our boss locked the keys inside the building.

Good News: We didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.

Bad News: My boss finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory™. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls.

Good News: A cute girl saw me do it.

Bad News: It was Maggie, and since she’s already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. She knows.

There are million dollar blockbuster movies that were less entertaining than the rollercoaster this post just took me on. 


library-mermaid:

👏🏼 MAY 👏🏼 I 👏🏼 JUST 👏🏼 SAY 👏🏼 that I LIVE for expanded characterizations of girls that don’t ignore or change what we already know of them, especially their femininity? Let Parvati & Lavender be badass dueling wand warriors who still say “Ooooh!” and have giant silly crushes on Firenze and love themselves the heck out of some baby unicorns and tea leaf readings. You go Parvati Patil. Fight with that butterfly ornament in ur hair. F the wizard patriarchy. Fight like a girl.


thundcrstorms:
“why is this the truest shit to ever hit the internet
”

korra:

youngblackandvegan:

radiophile:

Bob and the deli guy.

“im mostly straight”

this episode was so game changing


illonink:

My top three feminist exploitations of male-default language:

1. “Valar morghulis. All men must die.” “Yes, but we are not men.” - Daenerys, Game of Thrones

2. “No man can kill me!” “I am no man!!!!” - Eowyn, LotR: Return of the King

3. “God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs. God creates man. Man destroys God. Man creates dinosaurs.” “Dinosaurs eat man. Woman inherits the earth.” - Dr. Ellie Sattler, Jurassic Park


ohdionne:

ohdionne:

I wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. the heroes are always sprinting, always running. you ever seen darth vader run? hell no. and I ain’t about to either.

this has gained over 18,000 notes in the last 24 hours and I feel the need to tell y’all that I’ve never seen a star wars movie all the way through. when I wrote this I was 100% relying on the hope that he didn’t run in the films or some nerd was gonna drag my ass